It’s New Year’s Resolution Time or Is It?
It’s nearing the end of the first week of the New Year. It’s that time of year where many are taking inventory of their life. Some are assessing the previous year and beating themselves up over not keeping their last new year resolutions. Some are going over that bullet journal or list they have created year after year still sitting undone. Raise your hand if you made a resolution or two. What were your New Year’s resolutions? When I used to create them, my list would look something like, lose weight, get more organized, stick to a routine, etc., and all of these are wonderful things. I am a recovering new year resolution maker. Now, that being said, if you make them and they work for you that is wonderful. The practice just isn’t my cup of tea. Why?
The truth is, if any of you resemble the mass majority, and from my personal experience, most of us will do the same thing we always do: We get out the planner, some with a joyful heart and others with a heart attitude of obligation. What do we do next? We set some goals, make lists, read another blog about getting off to the best start for the new year. What happens to these goals, lists, intentions? I would argue for most they are out the window by the end of the first week of the new year. This cycle only perpetuates those feelings of failure and inadequacy, which in turn leads down a funnel of negative feelings which definitely does not motivate us to achieve goals. Einstein once said:
“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
That being said, I offer a different perspective.This year instead of starting off with a million goals you want to accomplish, I would propose you just don’t do it. Don’t feel the pressure of setting goals for this new year. I know I am getting some pushback after this statement. However, consider for a moment why those things you write down every year never get accomplished. Maybe you didn’t really want to, or maybe your were too busy planning to do things that do not feed your soul. When I would create a New Year’s resolution, I would find great steam at the beginning that just always fizzled out and I would get more unproductive as the year went on.
What do I suggest? First, ask yourself a question, what do you really want out of life and why do you want it? Not what others want for you. Not what some book tells you to want. This isn’t an exercise based on the expectation of others, or a false need to conform to what everyone else is doing. None of us were meant to live within a box. Think outside the box! For starters this year, how about you allow yourself to be you. It doesn’t seem life a typical New Year’s resolution, but it’s actually a great one. Do not put so much pressure on yourself making resolutions you are not committed to, or don’t even really want to do, maybe this year you start out with just giving yourself room to breath. Look around, give yourself a chance to breath long enough to see the wood for the trees. Once the question of what you want is answered and why you want it, only then will your goals be accomplished not because you have written them down but because you see the purpose behind each goal that has been created.
When do you start lists, planning and goals to get your wants accomplished? Any day is a great day to start. It does not have to be
January 1, 2022. It can be next week, next month, or even next year if it takes you that long to figure out your what and why. Figure out your what and why and that will be the start of you implementing lists, plans, and goals to get you there. Need help figuring out your what and why? Try taking a personality inventory, there are several out there like the DISC profile, www.discprofile.com or the Enneagram, www.enneagraminstitute.com is another good one Ask those close to you what they see as your strengths and weaknesses. What are you passionate about?
Lastly, take in a deep breath and just breath! Rome wasn’t built in a day and all things take time. Take some time. Figure out what you want and why you want it and that will be the catalyst for this next year to be different than last year. That is your first step.